It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
where are you?
Hypothermia
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
