It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
