Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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