why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
