How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
