before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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