you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I look better un-naked...
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
