And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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