your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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