i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Randomize