she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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