did you get engaged???
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
