she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
