we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
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