He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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