so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Randomize
