why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Houston, we have a blender
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
