That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Randomize
