just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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