I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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