youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
