All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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