Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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