tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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