you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
