did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize