I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Randomize
