how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
