Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
