I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Randomize
