McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
