Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
