Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
