used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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