Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
