so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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