Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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