I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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