We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize