i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I did not marry a roomba.
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