Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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