I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
