I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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