Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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