I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
