I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
