i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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