I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
false alarm. still invincible.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
