dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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