I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Randomize
