I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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