Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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