i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
